Quite honestly, your biz kicks butt.
You’re an awesome parent/partner/friend, but you NEED to pull yourself out of the hustle and stop operating in fire-putting-out-mode (that’s the scientific name for it) ALL THE TIME.
Because seriously- money is pretty awesome to have.
But I know first-hand that if your life feels out of control, if you’re in chicken-with-no-head mode, if you’re yelling at your dog/kid (and calling them the wrong name– sometimes in a pinch I just refer to my dogs by color, because in heated moments I blank on their names: “White Dog! LEAVE THE BUTTER WRAPPER IN THE TRASH!”) then the WINS in your biz just DON’T. FEEL. AS. GREAT. AS. THEY. COULD.
Are you familiar with Fire-Putting-Out-Mode? It’s that fun place in your biz where you feel like ALL you do all day long is run around, putting out fires. It feels like ONLY the things that are actually burning get your attention. You can’t chip away at your to-do list, and it keeps growing. Your kids need to scream to get your full attention. Your house…honestly, if it’s not considered condemnable, it can just wait a day…or until you have time to get to it. And your love life? WHAT love life? When’s the last time there were candles and a kid-free bed?
Here’s the thing: Fire-Putting-Out-Mode isn’t just bad for YOU. It isn’t just bad for your relationships, or your health, or your quality of life.
It’s bad for your BIZ. It’s bad for how you FEEL about your biz. (And a biz you cringe to wake up to is NOT sustainable OR built for success.)
Fire-Putting-Out-Mode is also know as REACTIONARY MODE. And in reactionary mode you’re on autopilot. You’re more likely to take things personally, instead of allowing them to roll off your back. You’re more likely to make snap decisions that don’t work out for you-OR your biz.
In reactionary mode you’re simply rolling with the punches, staggering about as you duck and block. Everything has equal priority because EVERYTHING IS ON FIRE. You’re doing too many things, and few of them WELL.
Does this ring true?
Growing a successful biz that also FEELS good, allows you time for the rest of your life, in which you feel in control of your time (vs feeling like it’s holding a cat o’nine’ tails over your back) is what I teach ALL my clients to do.
Because without the joy, the peace of mind, the time for yoga, naps, quality time with loved ones, unplugged time, good meals, walks on the beach/woods/whatever…what good is the money?
I’d like to give you my concrete 3 top tools to learn how to RESPOND in your biz vs. REACT-it’s a crucial paring for this article-sort of like candles and adult bedtime 😉
Tool 1: Pulse-taking without judgement:
It’s a default-setting of women biz owners to see MOSTLY what’s NOT working in your biz.
One of the most important pieces that I teach my clients is about showing up with 100% ownership in your biz. “Pulse-taking” contributes to standing in ownership by building in a process of evaluation and learning as you move through your day to day so you can actually step out of reactionary mode and see your biz from a bird’s-eyeview (something that is virtually impossible in reactionary mode).
Pulse taking requires that you step out of your head/stories/old beliefs and look without judgement at the data.
It gently guides you from what you think/feel/fear to simply what’s happening, so you can see it clearly. It’s JUST looking at the info. That’s empowering because once you see the info, you can make more grounded decisions about what makes sense to tweak or change- it takes you out of your STORY.
Tool Number 2: Clean House
Once you’re clear about what’s working and what’s not, you can separate into four categories: things you absolutely need to be doing NOW, things that can be back-burnered, things that need to be done but not by you, things that really don’t need to be done/you don’t need to be involved in at all. I had one client who did this exercise and gave notice for THREE boards that she was on in one day 🙂 She had so much more time, and even MORE peace of mind!
Tool Number 3: Get CRYSTAL clear
Gaining clarity about exactly what your goal is in any given moment, and what your priorities are (hint: they should FEED the goal!)
THEN, the actions/events/work that make it onto your calendar should FEED those priorities (which then feed the goal (s)). See how it all can flow?
For instance: my top priorities right now are the health of my biz (with specific, measurable goals for this year) and the health of my family and self (less measurable goals, but still easy to see what contributes to that and what doesn’t).
SO: someone asks me to attend an event in an already packed schedule. FIRST, I say, “That sounds amazing! Let me check my calendar and get back to you.” (Notice how I don’t answer in the moment or to the person’s face? That avoids people-pleasing tendencies and answering without checking to see if it passes the test)
The test: I hold offered event up to my two big goals:
Does it contribute to my biz goals?
Does it contribute to my personal goals?
If no, I decline.
If yes, I see if there’s room for it- can anything else be shifted, delegated, or eliminated from my calendar?
OK, let’s wrap up- what are you seeing here? Where is one place in your biz that you’d like to get OUT of Fire-Putting-Out-Mode? What would the effects be on your biz and the rest of your life? What’s ONE piece of this article that you can put into play to begin?